10 Things You Should Know About High Heels
The LamLogs know zero about high heels but the LamGal is a high heel goddess. Here is a list of 10 things every girl should know about high heels according to the LamGal:
1. The Square toe is out. Pointed and Round toes are In
Obviously this only applies to high heels. My loafers, which were personally chosen by the LamGal, have squared toes.
2. The higher the Heel the smaller your ankles look
And the smaller your ankles, the smaller your legs. And the smaller your legs, the smaller your ass. And the smaller your ass, the nicer your body. And the nicer your body… well, you get the picture.
3. If you are flat footed a higher heel might be more comfortable. A shoe with a higher heel has a natural built in arch that compensates for your lack off. The opposite does not apply for what ever reason???
Girls, you are on your own on this one.
4. Stilettos are not Stilettos unless they are 4 inches or more
Recognize.
5. If they are less then 3 inches they are called Pumps
Po-tay-toe, Po-ta-toe.
6. Pumps are out
LamGal is straying a little off the topic now.
7. White pumps (no matter what season) are always out
Something tells me the LamGal doesn’t like pumps.
8. People should be shot for wearing open toe heels w/ stockings. Never wear open toes with stockings
As you can see, the LamGal is very passionate about shoes.
9. Heels should always fit comfortably enough for you to walk in with out people knowing that you are in pain
There is nothing worse than going on a date with a girl, working your game, thinking you can close the deal, and finding out that her freaking feet are bleeding.
10. Buy shoes that look the cutest on you. Learn how to control the pain
Use it as practice for child birth.
So there you have it. The LamLogs are coming to niner niner. Until then, check us out here.
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